Tips for a productive household budget meeting

by @PaulFiarkoski

After seventeen years of marriage and countless arguments over money, my wife and I recently got serious about getting out of debt. We’ve been following the Dave Ramsey Total Money Makeover program where you take a series of steps with the ultimate goal of becoming completely debt free. First you cut out all frivolous spending and set aside $1,000 in savings. Then you start attacking all your debt from smallest loan to largest. After all your unsecured (no collateral) debt is paid off, you get aggressive with investing.

Pen and paper — For best results, take time to prepare for your household budget meeting.

One of the keys to cutting out frivolous spending is to hold a monthly budget meeting, presumably with your spouse. It’s a good idea for domestic partners and single people too. We’re prepping for our third monthly budget meeting and are really starting to see some results – mainly in the way of fewer arguments over money.

Below are some tips that we have found help us have successful budget meetings and outcomes. If you have questions, post them in the comments and I’ll respond the best I can.

Set some ground rules
Create some simple ground rules to review at the beginning of each meeting. You should read them out loud before getting into the money discussion. We have found it’s also good to pray before starting the money talk to get our heads and hearts in the right place.

Here are the ground rules we abide by:

We’re a team and we’re doing this activity for a mutually beneficial outcome.
It’s not about judging or finding fault; it’s about being responsible stewards with the gifts God blesses us with.
Each will listen and respect the other’s feelings and opinions.
We are not perfect and we won’t do it perfectly but we must get better over time.

Have an agenda
Make the best use of your time by sitting down with specific talking points and outcomes in mind. We use the same agenda from month to month. Below I have outlined the key things we talk about.

Track progress with net worth
Having been a registered financial consultant for over a decade, I learned that the best way to measure financial progress is net worth. Net worth is a pretty simple calculation; although gathering up the numbers can be a chore.

To calculate net worth, add up all your assets (what you own) and subtract your debt (what you owe). Include everything – home, cars, timeshares, retirement accounts, etc. On the credit side include all your debt, even credit cards and no short term furniture loans, etc.

Here is what we include in our net worth calculation:

Net Worth = Assets – Liabilties
Assets
Checking
Savings
Health Savings
Retirement account
IRAs

Liabilities
Mortgage
Overdraft line of credit
Medical bills

Pulling together the net worth data takes some time, but talking about it takes only about a minute. What I do is gather up the data and have it all set to go in a one page report prior to the monthly meeting with my wife. Websites like mint.com simplify this monthly task by aggregating multiple financial accounts into one application. Many banks and credit unions now offer these online aggregation services too.

The idea is to look at your net worth on a regular basis to see if it’s increasing or decreasing. It’s sort of like using a scale to keep track of weight loss.

Wins and losses
Next, talk about what you did well last month from a budget standpoint. This can be a great opportunity to score brownie points with your partner if you approach it right. Focus on things each other did well, rather than spotlight ways where the other blew it. This doesn’t mean you should ignore obvious “withdrawals” of fiscal trust; just be careful in how you approach shortcomings on the part of each other.

Talk about things that pulled you off course. If talking about who spent how much on coffee, nails, hair, etc. is likely to start an argument, consider making the decision that each of you get a set amount of cash each month to spend as you wish. Then take that cash out at the ATM and don’t hold each other accountable to it.

What’s coming up
Once you have made it through what will likely be the most emotionally charged part of the meeting, talk about what the next month looks like in terms of money coming in and money you need to pay out. I have found it helpful to use spreadsheet and plot out every day of the coming month and what money we expect to receive or to pay out. It’s time consuming and sometimes painful, but it’s what you will do if you want to break out of a financial rut.

Agreed goals
Finally, close the meeting by reminding yourselves of the financial goals you have in common and discuss how you’re tracking to meet them. If you haven’t established any goals, consider starting with the baby steps that millions of debt-free Dave Ramsey followers have based their success on.

How often to meet
My suggestion is to have the budget meeting once a month for starters. Sit down in a distraction free environment at least an hour and talk it out. We get together on the back patio. Stay in constant communication with each other about the budget, especially when one of you is about to spend money that wasn’t part of the last budget discussion.

Don’t put it off
The only way to fail is to not try it. Feel free to use some of the ideas that have worked for us or create your own approach. I have also found some great resources on Dave Ramsey’s website.

Buying health insurance in the Obamacare era

by Paul Fiarkoski

The Affordable Care Act – aka Obamacare – has become a hot political topic as of late. Oddly, this issue has divided even voters registered within the political parties.

From my perspective, much of the talk before the Obama healthcare plan went into effect was rhetoric based on fear. As a result of my insurance training, the notion of having everyone in the U.S. insured would spread risk across a huge pool of people and greatly reduce costs across the board.

Now that Obamacare has been in place for about a year, I’d like to share my family’s recent experience with the health insurance buying process.

Want the conclusion? Here’s mine: Obamacare is sorely needed in today’s economy.

Background
Due to a new career path I decided to take, my wife and I recently (July 2012) found ourselves in the market for health insurance for our family of four. I gave up the group insurance I had for the last twelve years and decided to pay out of pocket for a high-deductible individual policy. We have two tween-aged daughters. The company we dealt with is Aetna. That’s who I had the group policy with and who I applied for the individual policy with.

I thought it would make things simpler to stick with them since every one of our health insurance claims went through Aetna for more than a decade. I couldn’t have been more wrong. We still had to document for them every doctor visit, illness, etc. over the past ten years. When I suggested that they look up our claims and base their decision of whether or not to insure us based on their records, the representative said they couldn’t do that due to privacy laws. Right from the script!

Playing by the insurance company’s rules
Really? Privacy laws prevent me from giving my own insurance company access to their own files containing information about my health. I didn’t like that answer but played along since I really didn’t want my family to be uninsured.

As it turned out, my wife was denied coverage completely. And not just for me misstating her height and weight. It was that, combined with something that was not discovered in the physical but that my wife mentioned to the doctor, who logged it in her notes to the insurance company. We paid out of pocket to have the doctor treat the other matter, then appealed Aetna’s decision knowing in our minds that my wife would likely not be able to get coverage with another company now since one of the key questions on a new application is “Have you ever been denied coverage by any insurance company?”

I was issued a policy but with a 40% higher premium than I was originally quoted. Even though the bloodwork that I paid out of pocket for revealed that I’m in better health than I was five years ago, they rated me for “pre-diabetes,” likely because I mentioned on the application that a family member has diabetes. Great, now I’m paying more for revealing information that is none of Aetna’s business and they would have otherwise had no access to. Both of my kiddos were issued policies but one of them was rated higher due to an injury she sustained at gymnastics practice six months earlier.

At that point I couldn’t help but wondering if I had not mentioned the gymnastics injury, or my family member’s diabetes, or if I had been accurate with my wife’s height and weight, would we be having any of this trouble. Would Aetna have detected omissions on the application by checking our claim history? Call me a cynic, but my hunch is that yes they would.

Light at the end of the tunnel
Currently I and my two kids are insured. My wife is still uninsured as we await the outcome of the appeal. In the meantime, thanks to a tidbit I found in small print on Aetna’s denial letter, my wife will be eligible to apply for a “no pre-existing conditions” policy in early 2013. Prior to Obamacare this option would not have existed. I have already checked the premiums and the cost is about 30% higher than what Aetna originally quoted us. Chances are that even if Aetna does decide to cover her, it will be at an increased rate.

Regardless of the outcome, it is good to know that thanks to Obamacare we have the ability to get insurance for my wife. We just need to pray that she remains healthy until her insurance kicks in.

Option for people who have been denied health insurance
Apply for insurance under the Pre-existing Condition Insurance Plan made possible by the Affordable Care Act. Get details at www.pcip.gov

As for the runaround and rated policies we received from Aetna, I don’t attribute that to Obamacare. Having dealt with them for the last twelve years for my group policy, I have become wise to their archaic infrastructure and tendency to stonewall when it comes to paying out benefits.

Lessons learned
Here are some tips I would offer to anyone thinking about applying for an individual (not group) health insurance policy:

Don’t guess when completing the application. I guessed my wife is 5’8′ and 120. Although I scored big points with her for that one, Aetna said she was too thin to be considered for coverage.
Don’t overshare. Since insurance companies are allgedly prevented from obtaining health information about your relatives, don’t reveal anything. Make them insure you based on your health.
Apply to more than one company about three months before you need the coverage. That’s about how long it can take to get insurance from the time you apply. This way you can go with the company that offers you the best overall package (price, service, efficiency) and tell the other(s) you won’t be needing them.
Keep detailed records of medical treatments you and your family members receive. It will save you a lot of grief if you ever have to apply for individual health insurance.

How to save over $6,000 a year with your dishwasher

Not just a dishwasher.
Think of it as a money saving machine.
Photo courtesy of lifehacker.com

Nobody in my family of four likes washing dishes. Especially not me. But we still take turns getting them done. Our system for determining whose turn it is works a little like the game of “Not it!”

As with any modern family, washing the dishes at our house means getting the scraps into the trash or disposal then placing them into the dishwasher. Not that hard, but we still despise it.

Inevitably my turn comes up at least once a week. I’ve been on this ‘Financial Peace’ kick inspired by Dave Ramsey, so I’ve adopted a little mind game to make doing the dishes a little more bearable.

I tell myself that for every load of dishes we wash we’re saving about $30. It’s not a precise calculation, but here’s the rationale: Typically we drop around $50 every time we go out to eat as a family. I guesstimate that we spend about $10 to $15 on groceries when we cook a meal at home. Add to that another $3 to $5 for water, electricity and dishwasher detergent. If you’re an accountant, you can factor in depreciation of the plates, silverware and dishwasher itself, but I prefer to keep things simple. So basically, we spend $20 for a meal at home instead of $50 at a restaurant. Voila – $30 savings.

Consider how this example can play out over a year’s time. We run the dishwasher four to five times per week. Cha-ching! I estimate: we’re saving $120 a week by washing dishes at home. Multiply that by 52 weeks in a year. That’s a savings of $6,240 over the course of year. Now that’s something I can get excited about.

Economics of running the dishwasher:

$30 savings per load versus not dining out
$120 saved per week at 4 loads per week
x 52 weeks
$6,240 potential savings per year

Okay sure, nobody eats out 100% of the time; I get that. The point here is for me to find reasons to overcome my dislike for doing the dishes. And I’m telling you that the belief that I’m saving $6,240 a year does it for me.

The takeaway: If your family hates doing dishes as much as ours, calculate the cost of the alternative – dining out – or use my numbers. Once you have convinced yourself that washing dishes at home more often is better than dining out, it will give you the will to step up and wash dishes a little more frequently. That goes a long way in boosting your credibility when you assign the task to others in the household.

Ever wonder what happened to waterbeds? This explanation may surprise you.

By @PaulFiarkoski

Shortly after relocating from Denver to Phoenix in the summer of 2012 my wife and I were in the market for a new bed. In the process, we met a furniture store owner who has been in the business for over 30 years. Saying he knows his stuff would be a gross understatement. This guy can school anyone in the business, regardless of their experience level.

Needless to say, he earned utmost credibility with me in just a few minutes. He also knows a lot about backs, especially bad backs. After all, he has helped many people over the years who had come to him because they just can’t get a good night’s sleep with their back/mattress combination. He even has a bad back himself.

Since my wife has back issues, I found it natural to ask the question: What kind of mattress do you sleep on? A waterbed was his answer, followed by a quick dissertation on flotation being the most natural fit for any body.

My look surely went from convert to disbeliever as I scanned the showroom looking for a waterbed.

“I don’t sell them. They don’t make waterbeds anymore,” he said.

The explanation
He went on to tell me that back in the 90s, the three S’s of the mattress industry (Simmons, Sealy & Serta) pooled together to buy out all the remaining waterbed manufacturing plants under the stated intention of modernizing the facilities. They ended up shutting them down altogether and in effect killed off an entire industry, leaving consumers with only their high margin spring-loaded and new age foam models to choose from.

Sounds like a far-fetched conspiracy theory, I know. But it’s not the first time I’ve heard of companies playing hardball to eliminate threats to their profits.

Makes me wonder if the three S’s are buying up landfills too. Have you tried to dispose of a mattress lately? The cost is outrageous.

Incidentally, we had to exchange the high-end memory foam mattress we initially bought for a moderately priced coil and pillow top model. That’s just what feels best on my wife’s back.

The moral? Higher cost doesn’t always equal better. And you can’t trust companies that start with the letter ‘S’.