How to shock a fast food server

People who work in fast food pretty much see and hear it all. There is very little you or I say that they haven’t heard before.

Recently, I had an exchange with an African American worker at a nearby McDonald’s that left us both nearly speechless. I had just stopped in to use the free wifi and catch up on emails, so when it was my turn to order, I approached with my customary, “May I please have a small black coffee.”

“There’s that word again,” she replied.

I stood there in stunned silence thinking my use of the word “black” offended her. A checkmate of the eyes ensued for several seconds as I grasped for my next words.

Thankfully, she broke the silence with, “Please. I hardly ever hear that word and it’s so pleasing to the ear when I hear it.”

I explained that my niece who works in fast food recently told me that her biggest pet peave is when people come up to the counter and say “I want….”

Having worked in a number of service roles in the past myself, I try to be pleasant with service workers as a rule. However, my niece’s perspective helped me realize that I need to bring my A game in manners whenever I interact with fast food workers. Plus, I’ve been trying to model better manners for my teen daughters; even though they weren’t with me on this occasion.

I challenge you to give it a try. Next time you’re ordering food from a fast food worker, see if you can shock them by using your best manners. Extra credit: address the person by the name on his or her name tag when you thank them.

The work ethic of teens these days

Those of us of the Gen X generation and older often pass judgment on the teens of today with statements like these:

They have it so easy.
They don’t know what hard work is.
Where’s the work ethic?

I’ve been guilty of the same sort of prejudices.

Recently, my teenage daughter turned that all around for me. Less than one week after her 17th birthday, she reported to work for her first job: at 5 a.m. – on a school day! She’s lifeguarding at the neighborhood Y. The pool is outdoors. It’s January. We live in Phoenix. But still, it’s chilly in the morning, and on this morning it happens to be raining.

“Lifeguarding is not work,” some would say. “All they do is stand around and twirl a whistle.”

Having seen the effort she has put into it, I can now contest the previous statement. Lifeguarding is skilled labor at a minimum. Prior to even being granted an interview, she was required to give up two full weekends and two weeknights for the prerequisite training. She now knows every aspect of keeping others safe at the pool: first aid, CPR, dealing with panic, hypothermia and more. She paid a handsome sum out of her own pocket for the training with no hint of being reimbursed. She passed a series of in-class quizzes, plus two water tests, and a grilling of an interview with both her manager and the manager’s manager.

Today was her first day on the job. I was awakened at 4:15 a.m. by the sound of her getting ready. Although she’s pretty self sufficient, I got up to see if she needed any last minute help so she could scoot out the door on time. She was good. She had prepared everything she needed the night before: Clothes for work, clothes for school, her lunch, and gear for swim practice after school.

To say I am proud of her would be an understatement. But, the purpose of this post is not to brag about my daughter, although I could do so all day long. My hope is that you will join me in looking a little deeper into the plight of today’s youth. In many ways, they face far more challenges and obstacles than many of us did when we were growing up. Let’s show them our respect with words of encouragement and gratitude. Thank you!

A remarkable display of patriotism

My wife and I have been looking after an elderly 30-year U.S. Air Force veteran whose service spanned the entire Vietnam era, and then some.

Recently, he needed some concrete and tile work done in the main bathroom and he expressed to my wife that he was worried about the cost.

A contractor named Efrain came over to see what kind of work needed to be done and returned the following day. While waiting for the concrete to set, he took time to ask the Vet about some pictures from the retiree’s flying years that my wife arranged neatly on the wall just a few days earlier.

As Efrain finished the job and headed for the door, the elder asked how much he owed.

“Thank you for your service,” was Efrain’s reply.

Remarkable!

I would love to hear your stories of how you honor veterans or remarkable displays of patriotism you have witnessed.

My new year’s resolution: Dropping the F-bomb

I know what you are thinking. Why would anyone want to make using the F-word a resolution? That’s just it: I don’t want to start using the F-word. I want to drop it from my vocabulary altogether.

For many of you, this may sound like a trivial resolution. However, use of the F-word has become all too commonplace for me. Although few people in my social circles have heard me use the F-word, it has become a word I rely on far too frequently in my vocabulary – especially when I’m alone.

Many times, I use it only when I’m talking to myself, such as when I’m driving or going about my work day. I use it as a noun, a verb, an adjective, a pronoun, and often as a complete sentence.

It always sets me back when I hear somebody that I respect otherwise, drop the F-bomb in the course of conversation. One day, it occurred to me that others probably have similar reactions when I use it. And if negative talk has any impact on moods (I believe it does), then I might be able to improve my overall mood by nixing the F-word.

In any case, the word is never used to express anything positive when it comes out of my mouth. My hope is to eradicate it from my lexicon altogether, since it does not benefit me in any way. Effective immediately, I will cease to use the F-word.

Challenge: Give the gift of your full attention

Challenge for the week: Give the gift of your full attention.

Give the gift of your full attention. That’s a gift few people give. That gift alone will make others want to be around you and remember you.

You can’t connect with others if you’re busy connecting with your stuff, too. Put your stuff away. Don’t check your phone. Don’t glance at your monitor. Don’t focus on anything else, even for a moment.

A lesson on how to stand behind your work

Does a guarantee really mean anything in this day and age? Think about it: When something goes wrong with an item you buy at a retail store, who bears the burden of proof? The consumer.

What do you hear when something goes wrong with something you purchase? Prove to me you bought it here when you say you did. Prove to me you didn’t break it through misuse.

With services, it can be even more tricky, unless you have it all in writing. And then you have the burden of keeping the paperwork filed someplace where you can retrieve it.

Recently I found someone who has put an end to all that nonsense. We’re in the market to have our exterior block wall covered with a stucco. I’m a bit of a bargain shopper so I called Dwight after seeing his handwritten sign on a neighborhood street corner.

As I worked my way through a litany questions in the backyard, I got around to asking if his work comes with a warranty.

“Yes!” was his response. “As long as I’m alive my work is warrantied. So for about another 25 to 30 years or so. After that, you’re on your own.”

I can’t ask for much more than that now can I?

Would you take action to save a life if company rules prohibit it?

Today I heard the story about a nursing home worker in California who called 911 to request help for a patient who was unconscious. When the 911 operator urged the caller to administer CPR and offered guidance on how to do it, she refused on the grounds that her employer’s rule prohibit it. The patient later died and the employer went on record saying she did the right thing.

This case reminded me of a moral dilemma I found myself in in 2012. Without giving too many details, I was reprimanded for calling someone who expressed the need for help on Facebook. The corporate line was that if something bad had happened to the poster after my contact with him, our corporation might be held liable.

Well, excuse me for being human! As it turned out, the man was very grateful for my call and I suffered no consequences other than a verbal warning from my superior. However, I really began to question the mission of my (former) employer that appeared to have put profits before people.

So, I open the dilemma up to you for consideration: Would you deliberately break a rule of your employer if it potentially meant saving another person’s life?

Update: It turns out the nurse who refuse to perform CPR did so because the patient had a ‘Do not resuscitate’ order on file with the facility. Would that change how you would respond?

Reflections on 12-12-12: No ordinary Wednesday

by @PaulFiarkoski

I’m not into numerology, so I don’t believe anything special happens when numbers line up in a certain way. That said, all the hype with 12-12-12 could have came and went for me with almost no significance. Same for last year on November 11, and October 10 the year before that. August 8, 2008 (08-08-08) was sort of cool since it was my sister’s birthday – and the day of the opening ceremonies for the Beijing Olympics.

My lack of interest in a numerically significant date notwithstanding, somehow a switch was flipped for me the morning of December 12, 2012. It actually started the night before when my 11 year-old daughter made me pinky promise I would take a picture of my iPod screen for her at exactly 12:12 pm since she would be at school.

Couldn’t avoid the buzz
When I checked in on Facebook the morning of the 12th, my feed was lit up with all things 12-12-12. Same thing on Twitter. One post in particular stood out to me: ” 12.12.12 …I have the DVR all ready to go!,” a friend from my high school posted. It was then that I remembered hearing about the benefit concert taking place later in the day at New York’s Madison Square Garden. I promptly set my DVR too.

Time check
I worked from home that day and started my lunch hour at exactly 12 noon, so could I stay focused on upholding the pledge I made to my daughter. An added bonus was being able to hug and kiss my wife like we do each New Year’s eve at midnight. I captured the special moment on my iPod and posted the image on Facebook with a snarky comment about surviving 12-12-12. Even though I know the Mayans alleged apacolypse was allegedly not to occur until December 21, so many people mistook the twelfth for D-day that I decided to play along.

The screen shot I took of my iPod screen at 12:12 on December 12, 2012.

Benefit concert
The day continued as any usual Wednesday would until 6:30 local time when the 12-12-12 benefit concert came on the tv. What a line up! When it kicked off with Bruce Springstein and Bon Jovi I quickly realized this was going to be a big event. The legends just kept parading out, one after another. Roger Waters (Pink Floyd), Eric Clapton, Mick Jagger, the Who. Honestly, I got chills a few times just sitting there watching these larger than life rock stars humble themselves for the cause of raising money for those suffering from the effects of SuperStorm Sandy.

I checked in on Facebook and Twitter a couple times during the show to see how others were reacting to the performances. Most were impressed, although there were a few low points. Kanye West comes to mind. A personal favorite for me was Adam Sandler’s rendition of Hallelujah. An instant classic! The biggest shock for me was that Alicia Keys did not sing her hit “New York”. Maybe I’ll find out when I play the rest of the concert on the 13th that it was part of a finale. I hope so.

Like Farm Aid on steroids
Here was my one-liner that summarized how I felt about the concert: Farm Aid has been working out and taking roids for the last 25 years and has re-emerged as the #121212concert for Superstorm Sandy victims.

I mentioned to my wife that when we look back at tonight in ten years or so, we’re going to realize this was a bigger event than Woodstock, BandAid or any of the other big time concert events.

Meteor Shower
Another topic that others were commenting about on social media was the Geminid Meteor Shower – an event I would not have been aware of were it not for Facebook. Then Kanye West took the stage. About 45 seconds into his act I decided then was a good time to make a break for the hot tub. Everyone else in the family had already dozed off, so I was solo. Low and behold, I saw a few streaks from the meteors whizzing through the night sky, high above South Mountain on the south edge of Phoenix.

I still don’t believe there is any thing special about how certain numbers line up. But thanks to the large contingent of others that do believe, 12-12-12 was anything but an ordinary Wednesday for me.

Buying health insurance in the Obamacare era

by Paul Fiarkoski

The Affordable Care Act – aka Obamacare – has become a hot political topic as of late. Oddly, this issue has divided even voters registered within the political parties.

From my perspective, much of the talk before the Obama healthcare plan went into effect was rhetoric based on fear. As a result of my insurance training, the notion of having everyone in the U.S. insured would spread risk across a huge pool of people and greatly reduce costs across the board.

Now that Obamacare has been in place for about a year, I’d like to share my family’s recent experience with the health insurance buying process.

Want the conclusion? Here’s mine: Obamacare is sorely needed in today’s economy.

Background
Due to a new career path I decided to take, my wife and I recently (July 2012) found ourselves in the market for health insurance for our family of four. I gave up the group insurance I had for the last twelve years and decided to pay out of pocket for a high-deductible individual policy. We have two tween-aged daughters. The company we dealt with is Aetna. That’s who I had the group policy with and who I applied for the individual policy with.

I thought it would make things simpler to stick with them since every one of our health insurance claims went through Aetna for more than a decade. I couldn’t have been more wrong. We still had to document for them every doctor visit, illness, etc. over the past ten years. When I suggested that they look up our claims and base their decision of whether or not to insure us based on their records, the representative said they couldn’t do that due to privacy laws. Right from the script!

Playing by the insurance company’s rules
Really? Privacy laws prevent me from giving my own insurance company access to their own files containing information about my health. I didn’t like that answer but played along since I really didn’t want my family to be uninsured.

As it turned out, my wife was denied coverage completely. And not just for me misstating her height and weight. It was that, combined with something that was not discovered in the physical but that my wife mentioned to the doctor, who logged it in her notes to the insurance company. We paid out of pocket to have the doctor treat the other matter, then appealed Aetna’s decision knowing in our minds that my wife would likely not be able to get coverage with another company now since one of the key questions on a new application is “Have you ever been denied coverage by any insurance company?”

I was issued a policy but with a 40% higher premium than I was originally quoted. Even though the bloodwork that I paid out of pocket for revealed that I’m in better health than I was five years ago, they rated me for “pre-diabetes,” likely because I mentioned on the application that a family member has diabetes. Great, now I’m paying more for revealing information that is none of Aetna’s business and they would have otherwise had no access to. Both of my kiddos were issued policies but one of them was rated higher due to an injury she sustained at gymnastics practice six months earlier.

At that point I couldn’t help but wondering if I had not mentioned the gymnastics injury, or my family member’s diabetes, or if I had been accurate with my wife’s height and weight, would we be having any of this trouble. Would Aetna have detected omissions on the application by checking our claim history? Call me a cynic, but my hunch is that yes they would.

Light at the end of the tunnel
Currently I and my two kids are insured. My wife is still uninsured as we await the outcome of the appeal. In the meantime, thanks to a tidbit I found in small print on Aetna’s denial letter, my wife will be eligible to apply for a “no pre-existing conditions” policy in early 2013. Prior to Obamacare this option would not have existed. I have already checked the premiums and the cost is about 30% higher than what Aetna originally quoted us. Chances are that even if Aetna does decide to cover her, it will be at an increased rate.

Regardless of the outcome, it is good to know that thanks to Obamacare we have the ability to get insurance for my wife. We just need to pray that she remains healthy until her insurance kicks in.

Option for people who have been denied health insurance
Apply for insurance under the Pre-existing Condition Insurance Plan made possible by the Affordable Care Act. Get details at www.pcip.gov

As for the runaround and rated policies we received from Aetna, I don’t attribute that to Obamacare. Having dealt with them for the last twelve years for my group policy, I have become wise to their archaic infrastructure and tendency to stonewall when it comes to paying out benefits.

Lessons learned
Here are some tips I would offer to anyone thinking about applying for an individual (not group) health insurance policy:

Don’t guess when completing the application. I guessed my wife is 5’8′ and 120. Although I scored big points with her for that one, Aetna said she was too thin to be considered for coverage.
Don’t overshare. Since insurance companies are allgedly prevented from obtaining health information about your relatives, don’t reveal anything. Make them insure you based on your health.
Apply to more than one company about three months before you need the coverage. That’s about how long it can take to get insurance from the time you apply. This way you can go with the company that offers you the best overall package (price, service, efficiency) and tell the other(s) you won’t be needing them.
Keep detailed records of medical treatments you and your family members receive. It will save you a lot of grief if you ever have to apply for individual health insurance.

1. Keep it short and simple

2. Quiz opinion, not knowledge

3. Offer 4 responses or fewer